The second you push open the door you smell a really, horrible smell. Just to get some perspective here, we're talking all night toilet in a smelly bar full of smelly people who've been eating the worst cooked kibabs in history cooked by someone with about as much knolidge of fresh meet as your average vegan.

Such kibabs inevitably result in downling lots of beer very quickly, which fact accounts for at least half of the smell of drunk infested toilets, ---- the other half being due to the kibabbs themselves.

so, what I'm trying to get at here, is that the thing behind the door is smelly! really! smelly!

You actually expect a public toilet, but instead when the door fully opens you just find a common feature of public toilets, ---- well at least ones in magic schools.

A troll! a huge troll! a huge angry troll! a huge, grey, angry troll with an enormous club in it's hand.

now before you start thinking I'm about to go on a wrant about football clubs, youth clubs or any other sort of clubs, this club is the very serious, bloody huge, wooden nobbly kind. It's pretty certain that bloody is very much what you will be if you get smacked with it.

Also, while your not an expert on troll psychology, the large impressive growl coming from the troll, the fact that it's lifting that huge club up, and above all the fact that your actually feeling a very strong sensation to, ---- mmm, contribute to the general smelliness of the atmosphere seems to indicate that you need to do something quick.

So, what will you do?

 

fight the troll

slam the door in its face.

The horrible dungeons of dreadful doom.

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